Your values change over time. You’re human, it’s supposed to change. If not, then you haven’t learned or gained experience. Or perhaps, you’re not as open-minded as you thought you were. There’s maybe one or two values that remain the same, but the rest? They change as you grow.
When I was in high school, one of my values was family and religion. I really did enjoy spending time with my family, therefore, I valued it a lot. On the other hand, I thought I valued religion because all my life I knew it was important. For my mom, especially, religion was something that I needed to give my attention and time to. So, I said, it was one of my values. Was it really though?
This week, I asked my students what their values are. A lot of them said, family. Then I asked them, do you spend a lot of time with your family? Do you take the time to ask them how their day went? Do you appreciate your time with them? All of a sudden, it got silent.
Then, I thought. A lot of us would think that family is our value, but we don’t even work on our relationships with our family members. We just say it because we know that it’s important.
So I told them that when you say you value something, it has to be what you work hard on. For instance, one of my values is growing and gaining wisdom. Every single day, I do my best to improve certain aspects of my life. If I say that mental health is one of my values, I have to make sure that I’m taking care of myself. I don’t just say it because I think it’s essential, I say it because I actually act upon it.
I want you to think about your values and really see if you’re working on them because if not, then maybe it’s not something you value (enough).
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